Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Monkeys hate it when...

Let me preface this list with:
I recently owned a motorcycle and was lucky to get the visor up on my helmet to scratch my nose while the bike was in motion.  I couldn't hack the Thai roadways. 
On a moped/motorcycle in Thailand you can:

Drink hot coffee
transport your family of five in one trip
talk on your cell phone
smoke
drink a beer
change a diaper (yes..I saw this)
and today..to top off the list...Yo-Yo.  You can Yo-Yo to your heart's content. 

Over the last few days I've been trying to cultivate what I believe to be a healthy fear of monkey violence in Nathan.  I'm not sure where this deeply rooted notion of terrible monkey acts started..maybe too many episodes of Chimp Eden, or the second-hand stories of attacks that were passed through my Senegalese villagers.  Over dinner three nights ago I started with "Nathan, did you know that monkeys hate it when you wave bananas at them?"  He chuckled...I had my work cut out for me. 
Walking on the beach, "Nathan, monkeys really hate being caught off guard"  No chuckle, just a slightly raised eyebrow. 
In the market bargaining for a pair of shorts, "Nathan, monkey moms are incredibly protective of their young, and could kill you before you blinked."
All of this brain washing paid off.  We survived a visit at Monkey Beach on Phi Phi Island today.  It was insane..people made all the major mistakes.  Waving bananas, taunting mothers, touching!  I sat in the back of the transport van on the way home with two people speaking a language I couldn't recognize.  I decided not to be a buzz kill, but what I really wanted to tell them as they relived their exciting monkey video which featured the man handing a monkey a bottle of coke, was "Hey, maybe next time you should be more careful.  Monkeys hate it when you take videos of them.  And did you know that monkey could have ripped your face off in about 1.5 seconds?"
For now, we're safe.  Tomorrow we fly to Chiang Mai where we will prepare for a three day jungle trek with elephant riding.  I don't have the same completely rational fear of elephants.

2 comments:

Victoria said...

Jenny...I just love reading your posts...it's like reading a "good book". I told Sabrina you should compile these posts into a book when your trip is through, you're a great writer!

Heather said...

Monkeys *love* being tickled. They prefer pepsi to coke. They want you to hand them bananas, right handed, of course. Elephants enjoy pedicures, and they all have repressed yearnings for pierced ears. Woman, we want stories of adventure!

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